Exhausted by all this form filling…………..Tuesday this week was a Red Letter Day. A really amazing Remember-It-Forever Day. We had a phone call saying somebody was coming to check the sheep medicine book, which got everyone in a bit of a flap (including OC, who flapped with energy trying to make up for last week’s catastrophe) Books were sought out, files checked….all sorts of muttering and writing, but come midday a terribly nice man, a Scot called Scott, arrived and he is a Health and Safety Expert Inspector! Imagine my astonishment and joy! A very god in the universe of H&S! He has an ology and a clipboard bigger than mine, and even a brief case! And he was wearing wellies and waterproof trews, and we took him round the sheds, and he loved the shepherds hut, and I was following his every move so closely I was actually shut into the shepherds hut momentarily, and had to make my predicament felt most audibly for fear of missing something important.
Then he came in for coffee and a chat. I sat under his feet so I could listen carefully and make surreptitious notes on my (smaller) clipboard. Well! He foresaw dangers I had no idea of and could never have thought up as I haven’t enough imagination to see that they could possibly occur! He talked of food bins……..(I confirmed that I can keep an eye on that for him)….. and then he went on to pest control, wanting maps and things. I struggled a bit with the concept he was trying to articulate. Definition of “a pest” surely is something or somebody who is annoyingly in a place you don’t want them to be, like a walker perhaps with a dog when we are all busy and cannot take the time to check it out, or lost cars turning round in the yard, or endless D of E students who cannot read a map or close a gate. How can you draw a map for that? He gave us a piece of paper headed “Pest Bait Plan Map”. We can bait pests now can we? What fun! More barking at walkers, cars and squirrels, officially sanctioned! Perhaps he meant we have to make a plan before we actually do the baiting. Bit challenging to organise that though, lots of forward thinking……..how do we know when they are coming? Or maybe we just make a plan and one size fits all and we call it up when we need it….yes, that makes more sense. I will get on to it.
And then Mr Scott pulled out papers with columns and lists and numbers on ….. Oh heaven! I tried to pull one of those over for a closer look, but only managed a quick glance before he noticed and picked it up off the floor again. He said he was going to put us in Class R13. That was exciting and I jotted it down to remind myself. R13. Think on that! And he gave us a Programme with headings, one called ‘Observations’ and BOXES TO TICK!!! Well, I am taking charge of that one…………..and I have to sign it too!
I seem to be becoming ever more important….Skye needs to be more respectful I think.
Better be careful about finding a good time to point that out.